love u stil...

i tot if i din bother tat feeling...i tot if i ignore tat felling...i'll b fine...
but i ended up like tis...cuz i stil love him...
it have been 3 years ard..yet, i stil cnt let go the feeling tat stay in my heart for 3 years ard...
it's hard for me to do tat~

i miss him alot...
it's all my fault~my frenz said so...i neo i did wrong but when i wan to fixed it bek, it's too late~
he told me tat he wana b alone tat time when v discuss bout tis question...but den he gt a gf after few months in college...yet they broke up n he complaint she spend alot..haha~it's kinda funny but i stil gt no more opportunity i think...

i've been waiting for 3 years after i rejected him...it's my fault n im wrong n i'll stil wait~
asked him b4..if he stil have a opportunity wil he wan the special relationship happen?he said if he gt a chance...i duno wat tat's mean but i'll satil waiting for him...

i realise tat act i cnt ignore tat feeling...i wil oways mis him~but i sked to tel him although juz a kidding...except if he asked~
am i stupid??
hurt a person...rejected him everytime he ask questions...
n now...i gt my balasan...mis him like hell...love him til i can b crazy n mad~it's painful...

he can understand me feeling??
he wil read tis post??
he wil think twice??
he wil agree with the question i asked??



i love u...i miss u~!!!






~christ~

Sadness....

mmm....agreed v yaya's words..."everyone is wearing a mask on their face"
y i'll say tat??hehe...cuz there's a mask on my face too...n i wore tat for years d...

面具，它只是一个让我掩饰自己的一用具而已~
每个人都把我看成是一个冷血的人。。没错！我就是。。
我不希望我的朋友看见我的心。。因为它是多么的丑陋。。
它的丑陋，包括了弥补不了的洞，还有伤疤~不管用在多年，在多时间，它还是一样。。一样丑。。久而久之，它就会变臭~再过几年，它会麻木，然后死掉...

有时候，我会特别开心。。。有时候，我会突然感伤。。。
这些时候，我该找谁分享？不管我找谁都好，他们只会嫌我烦。。要不然他们就会敷衍下我
然后就打发我。。。
其实有谁会知道，我的坚强，我的快乐其实都是在掩饰我的不开心？
又有谁会知道，我偶尔会半夜突然哭泣？？
在我哭泣，我又该不该找人诉苦？？

其实在我不开心时，我最想念的人就是我外婆。。
我跟她的会议就只停留在我大概六岁时，当时我们家就只剩我们两人。。
我躺在她腿上，她开着带子，我们一边听歌，还会跟着一起唱，因为都是儿歌。。。呵呵。。
当时的我们，很快乐。。但岁月不留人。。快乐也很短暂~

外婆，突然，好想你哦！！
每次我哭的时候都会想到你。。。你听得见我的心声吗？？

grandma...i mis u~

~christ~